Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Are you sabotaging yourself?

This was the question raised to the group last week at The Kitchen Table Network by Mark Edmonstone, former professional Rugby League Player, and motivational business speaker from Edmonstone Dynamics.


Mark's Mantra "Feel the fear, but do it anyway" is what made him a both a highly successful rugby league player (he represented Britan), and businessman, and it lead into him discussing with the group "Real Fear vs Imaginary Fear".


Real fear being something that you know could actually happen (he used his example of the very real possibility of being seriously hurt while playing rugby); and we have two basic choices when it comes to Real Fear: Fight or Flight. That is, either prepare yourself; become stronger, fitter, or smarter and fight; or high-tail it out of there!


On other hand, Imaginary Fear are those fears we "think could happen", often due to past experience. It is not a real fear...it is something that might happen...a classic example is a fear of rejection (in business or in personal relationships). It is these fears that will, it we let them, lead us to "sabotaging ourselves". A classic example is ones fear of providing a quote to a potential client; "what if they think it's too high?".


So how do these fears even evolve? Mark suggests that it is a learned behaviour which stems from the Schooling system and the home (yes, us parents might just be teaching our children to "fear the imaginary"). So he is determined to help us "unlearn the biological behavior".


Mark urged us to challenge these "imaginary fears"...."feel the fear and do it anyway".

Mark Edmonstone is living proof that by facing our fears, both real and imaginary, we can be successful in both life and business; because after a while these fears fade away. This is not to say we will never be fearful again....fears are a natural part of life! But rather than sabotaging ourselves in the first instance, how about we challenge them, or even better, turn them around and make them work for us!


~Mark Edomonstone pictured with Jackie Price and Kerry Stewart-Haynes from the Kitchen Table Network~

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